August 26, 2017


Commentary for August 4 2020:

Do I need to talk about the narrative significance of Eon doing the very thing he refused to do at the start of the chapter here? I mean, it seems almost crass to acknowledge it. But I recall receiving some criticism for this moment when Chapter 7 originally went online because of Eonís hypocrisy.

First of all, in my defence, a character being a hypocrite is not an example of bad writing; people can be hypocrites in real life, and I feel that Eon at least has some narrative justification for compromising his principles here. Thereís no rule in storytelling that says a character canít do a thing they said theyíd never do. Moreover, it is part of Eonís character arc in this chapter that he does the thing he previously said he wouldnít do; this is the entire reason heís doing it, to show that, yes, he can violate his own code of ethics if heís backed into a corner and sees no other option (Neutral Good leaning towards Lawful Good, remember). Hell, if weíd had that earlier scene with no later payoff, then why even bother bringing up the fact that a Jedi mind probe was an option? That was the entire point of this scene and the first scene of this chapter -- set-up and payoff -- and Iím surprised that at least one reader back in 2017 didnít seem to understand this.

Anyway, enough writersí handwringing. Letís talk about art.

I made things way too dark (visually speaking) in this chapter. The armour that the UNDF soldiers are all wearing is very dark, as is the orc armour, and some of the details really do get lost in it. Like, you need to stare at panel 3 for a few seconds before you notice that the injured soldier General Severnaya is carrying is missing a leg. Iíd try to make the armour either lighter or at least have a higher contrast between the different colours used on it in future. Otherwise, this is another page Iím quite pleased with, artistically.

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